Are We All Basically Good?
Loaded question, but let’s hear what the Existentialists think-
Oftentimes when a client first begins therapy, they may feel as though they have little to no choice in the outcome of their life as it stands currently. Many people describe being at a “crossroads” or turning point, seeking to challenge the status quo and create new meaning moving forward. This process isn’t easy and ultimately forces us to take responsibility for the choices we make and re-evaluate the ways in which we work through our “stuff”. The theory of existentialism is built on these ideals, often described as a philosophical or humanistic approach to therapy. It is not limited in terms of technique or formality and empowers clients to live as authentically as possible.
There have been many contributors to the existential framework as a response to universal human needs, some of the most well-known including Carl Rogers, Viktor Frankl, and Irvin Yalom. Their ideas came about after the devastation of WWII on the world, as many people began to question the meaning of life and what was to exist. The main tenet posited by existentialists is that we all have the capacity for self-awareness and that with increased awareness comes heightened fulfillment in life. It adds a positive element to the therapeutic process, viewing humans as basically good, with a definitive ability to change if they choose to do so. People learn to identify and engage more in what truly matters to them, with focused attention on the quality of their relationships. For many, it is helpful to learn how the pain they’re feeling is directly correlated with a lack of connection with not only others, but also themselves, the world in general, and even their spirituality. Working through this leads clients to understand the root of their struggles, reflect on the expectations they’re holding, and exploration of what comes up when these expectations are not met.
Existential therapy embraces three values:
○ The freedom to become within the context of natural and self-imposed limitations
○ The capacity to reflect on the meaning of our choices
○ The capacity to act on the choices we make
Within both individual and group settings, this practice allows the therapist to enter the client’s world and build the type of relationship that may serve as a model for change. People learn to come home themselves, finding the “courage to be” and taking their power back. The therapeutic process also educates us on the role anxiety plays in our life. Many of us see anxiety as a negative thing because of how deeply uncomfortable it is to sit with. Yet there is a difference between healthy and combative anxiety, both containing elements that are ultimately inevitable. So if we can count on it, we must learn to cope with it - right? While easier said than done, it is possible. When we learn to work with our anxiety, we not only start to believe in our own capacity for change but also become more likely to break patterns of behavior that limit our choices and determine our way of being in the world.
Existentialists also teach us to accept any anxiety we may have surrounding death, postulating that an awareness of the end of life actually allows us to appreciate the present and take advantage of the opportunities that come our way. It serves as a reminder to strive toward significance in our lives and live as out loud as possible. Over time, an unavoidable fact once experienced as daunting becomes the ultimate encourager of life. The more we can see anxiety as a condition of living, the more tools we can access to create our responses. If there is something about our lives no longer serving us, it doesn’t have to be that way!
With all of this said, it should be noted that existentialism has been held accountable for being limiting in terms of multicultural considerations. This is why it is important that therapists incorporate into the work an awareness of social change, considering client access and remaining mindful of the societal and cultural circumstances that shape different realities. Nonetheless, there are things in life that we all will experience during our time here: love, grief, pain, and worry. Having a place to talk about it when these issues arise can make all the difference in feeling less alone. If we're all going through it, why not share? Sometimes even sitting in with a group of others and being open about their vulnerabilities is the first step that changes everything. Learn more about therapy or group therapy today and click below!